Gnosis in a Hundred PagesPage 32 of 100 · Part II

Part II · The enemy within

The evening review, one self at a time

At night the review becomes a search: not the whole day as a story, but the moments where a self took over.

Read to me

0:00 / –:––
A small notebook by the bed, and a word for each self found.

You have walked the day backward each night since page 17. Now the review gains a purpose.

Before, you watched the whole day like a film, as a witness. Now, as you go backward, you look for particular moments: the ones where a self took the wheel. The sharp reply at dinner. The hour lost to a screen. The small lie at work. The flash of envy that passed so fast you nearly missed it.

You will find that the review shows you more than the day did. In the moment, the self was invisible, because you were it. At night, with a little distance, you can see it clearly. This is why the review is one of the best tools for the first step. Anything that happened can be used.

When you find a self, do not stop to wrestle with it. Mark it and keep going. If one moment stands out, you can come back to it in the meditation from page 30. In this way the practices of this part join together. The review collects. The meditation understands. The request lets go.

Keep a small notebook by the bed. A word or two for each self you found is enough. After a few weeks, read it back, and you will see which selves come most often. That is your map.

The evening review · practice three, deepened

  1. In bed, walk the day backward, as on page 17.
  2. This time, pause wherever a self took over, and name it.
  3. Ask: What set it off? What did it want?
  4. Write the names in a notebook by the bed, a word each.
  5. If one stands out, choose it for tomorrow’s meditation.

Words on this page

Retrospection
The evening review. Here it becomes the way the day’s selves are found.

In the old words

“Any scene, any occasion, any event, should serve us as a basis for self-discovery.”

The Fifth GospelSamael Aun Weor
On the next pageThe self that scolds you for having selves.33. The self that scolds you